Motherhood (and fatherhood too!)

What not to say to someone who’s just had a c-section

13 things you should never say to a C-section mom “All that matters is you had a healthy baby.” Uh, no Today’s Parent Magazine. Published March 20, 2017. Read online here I’m not going to name names, but after my first c-section, someone had the gall to inform me I was lucky because I got to forego labour. It wasn’t the first boneheaded comment someone made about my C-sections. And it wouldn’t be the last. But it was maybe the…

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Let them be

PATIENT PARENTING (PART OXYMORON, PART LIFE GOAL) I’ve been struggling with feelings of overwhelming frustration lately, mostly when it comes to my kids. My preschooler gets the brunt of it, because three year olds are difficult – as far as adults are concerned anyway, and therein lies our issue. She thinks and feels and acts exactly how she should at three years old. Our problem is that I haven’t mastered the art of understanding why she behaves the way she…

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Mother’s Day

 What new moms really want on their special day Original story and gift guide published in Metro on May 5, 2016   I barely remember my first Mother’s Day. I was four weeks into my new gig as a mom, walking around in a fog, exhausted and overwhelmed. Then one little ribbon-wrapped box from my husband turned that all around. Inside was a silver necklace with a circle pendant. On one side was my daughter’s name, on the other side…

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I know best

Parenting, and other peoples’ advice   Does anyone else feel like we’ve gone a little insane with all this “how DARE you judge me??!!” outrage that’s sweeping parenting blogs, Facebook groups and play dates lately? I feel like every other article is a tirade against parents who pipe up with “unsolicited” advice, which apparently makes you a total d-bag. Let’s take this recent Scary Mommy post Stop Being A Judgmental A**hole When Someone Tells You Their Child Isn’t Sleeping. I’ll…

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On “bad” parenting and terrible mistakes

  The tragic death of Harambe   Let’s all put down our pitchforks and torches for a minute, and talk reasonably about a terrible tragedy that just happened at the Cincinnati Zoo. A four-year-old boy somehow (we don’t know the logistics) managed to climb through several barriers and fell into a moat in the lowland gorilla habitat. A 400 pound male gorilla named Harambe took an immediate interest in the boy, alternating between hovering over him, hiding him in a…

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When perfect isn’t perfect enough

On million dollar families The house cleaner was dusting around the play kitchen and smiling at the kids. Polly, wearing a blue onesie, was chilling in her swing. “Boy?” she asked, motioning to Polly. “No, she’s a girl,” I responded. “Oh, two girls?” She shook her head with unreserved pity. “That’s too bad.” “Too bad?” I thought to myself. “How could anyone look at that perfect child and think ‘too bad’ about any aspect of her? And yet this woman…

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A letter to my daughter

Dance like no one is watching My beautiful girl, You’re only 15 months old, but I’ve never known another person so full of life, so unapologetic, so unabashed. This, my little button, is why I love you. I have more reasons to love you than there are stars in the sky, and this is one of them. One day you will not live so carefree. You will tug on your clothes with a self-conscious frown. You will blush when someone…

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C-section blues

When your body lets you down I couldn’t give birth to my daughter. I tried, the midwives tried, the on-call doctor tried, the drugs tried. Even the hippie new-age hypnosis tracks tried. But for some reason, after days of painful prodromal labour, my body just wasn’t going to send my daughter down the birth canal. So I had a C-section. I should feel blessed. I think of all the women who’ve had trouble conceiving, or who had rough deliveries or…

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Cloth diapering

How I became a cloth diaper convert Whenever a pregnant friend asks me the inevitable “What type of diapers should I buy?”, my answer without reservation is always: CLOTH. For many of them, this isn’t what they want to hear. They want to know what’s better, Pampers or Huggies, Costco or the Honest Company. But truthfully, if you’ve got access to your own washing machine, and a couple hundred dollars to buy all the diapers your child will ever need…

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